COVID-19 and the Toilet Paper Escapade

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It really sucks that my first blog post has to cover a topic that is really on everyone’s mind right now but not for good reason….The COVID-19 pandemic.

I thought I would weigh in on the topic and give my opinion.

There is a lot of fear gripping the world right now. People are watching the news or following it on social media and they’re getting scared. Who’s to say how bad the virus actually is? Hell even the CDC doesn’t know completely. This doesn’t stop FB scientists and social media doctors from trying to tell us how bad it is, with absolutely no knowledge of the topic aside from what they themselves hear from others. Everyone from the fry cook at McDonald’s to the 30 year old WoW player still chillin’ in their parent’s basement tries to give you statistics, numbers, and information. The problem I’ve found is that none of them really seem to be doing much research. They grab a headline and then run with it.

WHY THE TOILET PAPER?

So with all of these people claiming to know what they’re talking about, no one has come up with an answer for what the hell is up with the toilet paper…

People are losing their damn minds faster than the actual virus is spreading. It’s not just the average citizen losing their shit either. It’s the government officials too!

As soon as news about COVID19 hit social media, everyone in their superior wisdom and knowledge of survival, immediately went to their local Walmart to rid the shelves of…..toilet paper. Yes….toilet paper. Now maybe I need to ask the person who makes corn dogs at Sonic but I’m fairly certain that toilet paper is not going to save you from a virus, especially one that is respiratory. I’m also pretty sure that none of the symptoms of COVID19 is “shit yourself to death.”

The way this happened is almost as nonsensical as it sounds. There was never an announcement of a shortage of toilet paper. No announcement to stock up on it, nor an announcement that toilet paper shipments would stop. Everyone simply woke up one morning and decided to go buy every sheet of toilet paper they could get their hands on until it was all gone.

If that’s not bad enough, the very same people that initially bought 40 packs of 12 pack double roll Charmin….are now going back for more! What?!

The only reasoning I have is that perhaps they’re insulating their homes? Maybe they’re building panic rooms out of Angel Soft? Whatever it is that they’re doing with it, it’s apparently important enough to buy it all before anyone else has a chance to get some. What I do know is that there is a population of people who’s home is now standing room only because of toilet paper, while others have absolutely no way to get Chamin fresh after that Gordita lunch at Taco Bell.

To add to the frenzy, there are people yelling at store employees because of the shortage….while they have a shopping cart full of enough toilet paper to rewrap every mummy in Egypt twice. If they would only stop doing this, there wouldn’t be a shortage…. don’t tell them that though unless you like being called every name but your legal one.

Can someone please explain this nonsense to me? Drop it in the comments and let me know what you think of this.

Mark ThomasMark Thomas